Take a break. It's okay.
It’s okay to be not okay. It’s okay to not create new things or “live your best life” just now. I wanted to be sure you knew it, in case nobody has told you.
Back on January 14th, before the global pandemic swept around the world and turned us on our heads, I wrote this post entitled “What to do when the world feels too loud”, which included the excellent advice to TAKE A BREAK. It included permission to step away from the noise, including a list of seven ways to do that. I stand by the advice in that post, but I wanted to address this again in light of our current situation.
Nearly everyone I know is either staying at home or wishing they could stay at home right now, in order to slow the spread of the coronavirus that causes Covid-19. Those who are still working outside the home are usually essential workers, who are doing things like putting roofs over people’s heads (in the case of my daughter’s boyfriend), stocking and selling groceries (in the case of my cousin), or providing health care (in the case of my other cousins).
Those who are staying home are either working from home if their job allows it (in my case, since this is my “normal”) or wishing they could work (in the case of my daughters). Many people have been laid off, and some of them are worried that their places of work might not reopen once things start to open back up. Many of my friends are also (unexpectedly) home-schooling their kids, since public schools closed. Or their college-aged kids are now home because schools closed or their kids were laid off.
Not to belabor things, but nothing about this time is normal
Which brings me to the many articles and memes I’ve seen about how Sir Isaac Newton did his best work during a pandemic (plague), and Shakespeare wrote King Lear while in isolation during plague. Or you’ve see the posts about people who are learning new languages, new instruments, painting, writing, and doing ALL THE THINGS because they have the time.
I mean, bully for them.
But the way I see it, our work right now is not to create the next big thing. It is for us to take sufficient care of ourselves—body, mind, and spirit—that we don’t come out of this significantly worse off than we were when we began.
If you can’t get out of bed some days because you are so fatigued by all this that you need to sleep and rest, that’s okay. If carbs are making you happy and you are skipping protein or fruit & veggies on occasion, that is okay. If it’s all you can do to keep on keeping on, then you are doing enough.
As this graphic tweeted by Dr. Alison Berkowitz last week says, “You do not need to thrive right now. You don’t need to use this time wisely. It is ok to just survive it.”
If you need to take a break, take a break.
It is that simple.
Nothing is normal, so you shouldn’t be surprised if you are finding difficulty with things that require focus. Including reading books.
I have so many friends who are great readers who are having difficulty paying attention to the written page right now, and nearly all of them are worried that it means something is wrong with them. Yes, something is wrong, but it’s not them: it’s these outside circumstances that make it impossible for us to cope in normal ways. We are all stuck in low-level (or maybe high level) fight-or-flight, only we can’t go anywhere and there’s nothing to actively combat, so we are like cars, idling at a super high rate. We’re revved up, but not able to put that into action.
Image by Tora Helson
Take care of you.
If you prefer to read from paper, and would like a compilation of all of these posts that are optimized to print, I’ve created an e-book for you called Lower Your Anxiety.
Lower your anxiety
54 pages of resources to help you reduce feelings of anxiousness, from practical tips for when anxiety is spiking to suggestions about sleep, hydration, and more. Complete with a self-coaching exercise and other resources. $15
