Mean people suck

If you’ve been on social media or in a shopping mall or, well, pretty much anywhere in this world of ours, you are probably well aware that mean people suck.

They aren’t kind. They aren’t always polite. They might mock us or nag us or put us down.

They can be downright rude, nasty, even abusive.

They make us feel bad about ourselves: what we’re wearing, what we look like, what actions we have (or haven’t) taken, and more.

In the real world, it is impossible to avoid mean people entirely. This is true even if we are all alone.

The calls are coming from inside your head.

We all have an inner voice that offers us guidance and commentary.

Sometimes it sounds like, well, just “the voice inside our head.” But sometimes, it’s the inner critic, who may sound like a parent, teacher or other authority figure you’ve know. Or they might just sound like you, saying mean things to yourself.

I’ve heard a bunch of friends and clients sharing about this recently, because ‘tis the season. (Spoiler: ‘tis always the season when it comes to self-criticism.)

• “Are you really going to wear that?”

• “Why are you bothering to go that event—you don’t know anyone, and you’ll just be alone in a corner like a loser.”

• “Your holiday decorations suck. All your neighbors are going to think so.”

• “You shouldn’t ask for a raise/time off. It’ll just draw unwanted attention to you, and you’re not going to get it anyhow.”

• “Who do you think you are to _______?”

• “You’re so foolish/stupid/clumsy/awkward.”

These things come up for most everyone, especially if we want to stretch beyond our comfort zone. And for more of us than ever before, even leaving the house counts as going outside our comfort zone.

We have to work up the energy and/or enthusiasm to go to work, or the store, or religious services, or a party/event. And our inner mean girl senses our discomfort and decides to pipe up. She knows just where the buttons are located and how to push them in order to make us question our choices. Or to beat us up for simple mistakes, like forgetting why we walked into the kitchen.

This Thursday at 1 pm EST on Instagram Live, I’m teaching one simple trick to help you quiet your inner mean girl down. And of course I’ll post it afterwards, if you can’t make it while I’m live.

Follow me on IG so you can set a notification for when I go live!