But I forgot how to dream.
“I hear her call sweet dreams/But I forgot how to dream. ”
I forgot how to dream.
I don’t meant that I don’t dream at night, because I have vivid dreams when I sleep. But when it comes to dreaming (and dreaming big) about what’s next, what I want to create, what I want to be, do, and have? I’ve got nothing.
In large part, it’s that I’m happy with the life I have. Wanting something different or something more feels selfish. And what would that look like, anyhow? Why bother when things are fine the way they are? There are so many people in this world who are struggling, and I have so much (comparatively).
Then there’s another component:
And it feels a little threatening. Why fix it if it isn’t broken? Isn’t that ungrateful? How dare I want more when I already have enough? How dare I?
It was when I reached that last question that I saw the trap, which was set by patriarchy to keep us small. “You’ve got enough. Be happy with that. Be glad for what you’ve got and shut up.”
Don’t rock the boat.
Funnily enough, Morris and i just got home from a Caribbean cruise. We were traveling, one of the things I would definitely add to my dream list. We were on a ship that went through a storm on the way home, with twenty-foot seas that set that huge ship to rocking.
It could have been scary, or sickening. Instead, everything felt safe, and it rocked us to sleep. It made me think: When is the last time I rocked the boat? And what if rocking the boat is actually not a life-or-death situation?
Well, I’m ready to set my boat to rocking.
My guides have been getting quite loud about the need for me to make some changes. Because even though my big dreams are still a bit fuzzy, I can see the result.
It’s the getting there that’s hard, and I’ve been putting it off for at least the past two years: one on purpose, and one due to life circumstances. But now it’s time to stop treading water and start swimming.
Spoiler: I hate swimming. That statement is true on a literal as well as metaphorical basis, but to drag the metaphor out a bit more: I start to panic about having my head down, face in the water, and I convince myself I can’t breathe, even though I know the proper way to breathe while doing the crawl (another excellent metaphor). It’s also called freestyle, which also works on a metaphorical basis, because we are all just going along as best we can in our own ways.
Anyway, it’s time for me to embrace the idea of risk, and time to start dreaming again.
Maybe that’s true for you, too.
Have you been drifting on the currents or treading water instead of striking out in your own direction?
Maybe it’s because—like me—you forgot how to dream for a little while.
Or maybe you have been treading water for ages, but as hard as it is to keep treading, the thought of striking out in a direction feels overwhelming or scary.
Or maybe you have been allowing the currents (what your boss or partner or family wants for or from you) to carry you wherever they want, and now you’ve drifted so far that you aren't sure what direction you even need to face to get started.
It can be hard to strike out in a new direction when you feel sick & tired of what’s been going on. It is extra scary to go in a new direction when you haven’t done it before (so it’s unfamiliar) and you aren’t positive it will even take you where you want to go.
The thing is, you will find the right path or direction as long as you are in motion. If you don’t make a move, then your guides or the Universe can’t nudge you or tip you onto the right path. Maybe you need to start doing a thing right now because it will get you to meet a person who is the right connection for the actual path you want to be on.
“[K]nowing how way leads on to way” is why you need to choose a path, any path, trusting that it will get you where you need to go. (Don’t believe me? Read Robert Frost’s poem, “The Road Not Taken”.)
If you are starting to feel like you want to figure this out, I’ve got something for you.
If you feel called to rock the boat, or to figure out how to dream again, or to start into motion, then I invite you to join me on Saturday, March 16th from 1-4 pm EST for my Dream It, Do It workshop. This workshop is a 50% magic, and 50% practical af.
In a Dream It, Do It workshop, we engage in a guided meditation that will help you to time travel into your future to see what you life looks like a few years from now. You don’t have to know what that looks like right now, and, in fact, many people who do the workshop are surprised at what comes up for them during the meditation.
One of my first Dream It, Do It clients saw herself working in a different career—one that she had given up dreaming of, because it meant going back to school. Following the workshop, she enrolled in the master’s program, and now that several years have passed, she has graduated, and is working in her dream job. Along the way, she manifested a better place to live (more like what she’d seen in the vision).
Another saw herself opening her own art studio outside of her home. I was there 18 months later when she cut the ribbon on her dream studio, which she managed to keep going throughout the pandemic.
What happens during a Dream It, Do It workshop?
You essentially bend time and commune with your future self, then capture what your experience was using guided journaling questions so that you can easily close your eyes and revisit that future any time you want.
After that, we get you started on an energized vision board that amps up your intention by using feng shui principles in how you set your vision board up. This can be done old-school (cut and paste), or digitally (if you know how to use Canva or something similar). We also do just a bit of practical goal-setting, so that you map out the first few steps you plan to take.
Honestly, this workshop is fire. It’s one of my favorite coaching tools that I’ve developed, and the reason I keep offering this workshop from time to time is because it fucking works.
I invite you to explore your dreams (even if you aren’t yet aware of them), and figure out the first step(s) to make them happen. And if you want some additional coaching support as you get started, I offer a Dream Support package that gives you three coaching sessions in addition to the workshop, plus email access for six weeks, to make sure you and your nervous system are okay as you get started.
Three hours in community having fun and getting shit done. Perfect for those who are tired of floating with the tide or treading water, and who are ready to start making moves toward the life they want. Also perfect if you’ve forgotten how to dream.
P.S. Here’s a link to watch and listen to Carly Simon sing “That’s the Way I’ve Always Heard It Should Be.”
