Appreciating small joys

I sat down to write this week’s blog post, and I felt very much like Meg Ryan’s character in the movie You’ve Got Mail when she couldn’t think of a good comeback. Which is to say, that I drew a complete blank.

I should tell you that The Declutter Course is open for registration and will start on October 4th, and all the amazing things that are included and how great it is, but as I sit here today writing this, I don’t really feel like it. But I will drop this link to the sales page here because seriously, friends, it really is amazing and transformative and I’d love for you to join me.

I should talk about “back to school” (cue hysterical laughter/crying on the part of most moms I know right now), only I don’t want to further traumatize any of you that are experiencing the stresses and strains of the start of the school year during a global pandemic. Instead, I will just give you this here gift of a “back to school” list for moms or for anyone who has that sort of “start of the new year” thing going on. It is a quick download with some (online) shopping ideas in case you are looking for a pick-me-up.

Instead of “shoulding” all over myself, I find I want to talk about gratitude.

Yes, I know that 2020 is a whole shitshow and then some.

Things are scary af these days, with hurricanes and wildfires on top of the COVID pandemic and political issues including the election and racial injustice. Things are uncertain and maddening and that’s before those of us in the United States have to wonder whether we are witnessing the demise of our country as we know it.

Friends, I get it.

Heck, I’ve spent a lot of time talking about dealing with the mental health fallout that comes with this year, including anxiety and sleep issues, taking care of your basic needs, and more. Just scroll back through the last six months or so of these here weekly tips, or grab one of my ebooks.

Here’s the thing: I refuse to give in to despair.

“That’s easy to say, Kelly, but what does that mean? What does it look like on a daily basis?”

I have implemented most (and some days all) of the tips that I shared in blog posts and in my books, Lower Your Anxiety and 12 Tips to Help You Sleep.

I am protecting my sleep. Taking salt baths. Getting outside on a daily basis. Exercising regularly, which for me looks like some easy yoga stretches or a walk in my neighborhood. I’m working on eating more things that resemble fresh food, and less things that are manufactured/highly processed. Full disclosure: I still eat ice cream, but I choose Ben & Jerry’s Cherry Garcia (starts with “cream, skim milk, liquid sugar (sugar, water) . . . “) rather than things loaded with high fructose corn syrup. Similarly I still have a glass of wine or prosecco now and then, but I seldom have a second glass, and never more than two (otherwise it messes with my stomach and my sleep). I’ve also reduced my exposure to the news and to social media (it’s haaaaard, but so worth it).

Boiled down to basics, I’m aiming for more positives than negatives on any given day.

More good stuff, whether we are talking vegetables and fresh fruit, or meditation, or time outside; less toxic stuff, like hours of doomscrolling or focusing on news, sitting like a lump, and eating or drinking stuff that isn’t good for me.

I have started posting about small things I am grateful for on Instagram. Not the major things, like my husband or my daughters, but truly small things. A candle that I bought that I adore the scent of (and it has pretty design, too —it’s from my friend April at Willow Moon Candles). The rose quartz necklace from my friend Dot at DorothyClaire Crystals that I’m wearing as I type this post. Time spent reading on the patio with my husband, some prosecco, and some cheese and crackers.

Yesterday’s joys

This photo from my studio is full of small joys: a flying pig that I got at HomeGoods over a year ago, a blue glass water bottle from Mallorca, a carousel meant for K-cups that I use for my Liquitex soft body acrylics, my Harry Potter mug from my younger daughter, full of brushes, my greeting card display (it spins!), and a piece of one of my favorite paintings, which so far hasn’t moved to another home.

Focusing on gratitude helps.

It just does.

If you know that you are going to write down 3, 5, or 10 things that you are grateful for in your day, then you spend your day noticing when good things show up for you to write about. Even if it’s a shitty day full of shitty things, maybe somebody remembered to thank you or even wished you well. Maybe you had a cup of tea. Maybe you heard your favorite song on the radio. Maybe the sun made your shadow look 7 feet tall and all of a sudden you remembered how happy that sort of thing makes you now (or it reminded you of how you felt when you were 5 years old and saw a BIG shadow of yourself).

And guess what happens when you spend your day looking for and appreciating those good things, even if it’s just because you gave yourself the assignment of writing down those 3, 5, or 10 small joys?

It raises your vibe.

Just like it’s hard to stay mad when someone makes you laugh, it’s hard to stay in a sour mood or feel down for the whole day if you have pockets of gratitude or joy. Sure, your day might still suck, but if it sucks just a bit less, isn’t that a worthwhile goal?

And energy being what it is, if you are able to be grateful or thankful for the blessing of a moment’s peace, brought to you by focusing on that one small thing that brings you pleasure or makes you smile, then usually you are able to raise your own energetic vibration just a bit. If you are looking for, say, ten things to put on your gratitude list before bed (and there are different ways to observe a gratitude practice, which I will discuss in next week’s post), then that is ten individual bump-ups to your energetic vibe throughout the day.

Maybe it’s enough to raise you to a happier space; maybe it’s only enough to keep you from sinking further, but either way, I think you can see how that benefits you and (by extension) the people around you.

Follow me on Instagram to see what my daily small joys are.

Are you with me? Leave a comment and let me know!