How I'm rolling into February
I’m letting you know up front that this post veers into a discussion of body image and negative self-talk, in case either of those is triggering for you. Though it’s also about decluttering and other stuff.
This week is a pretty good sample of what my life consists of these days. I’ve got coaching calls scheduled, some networking stuff scheduled, I’m writing this blog post and tomorrow’s newsletter, I’ve been spending time with my husband and my cat, meditating and doing some yoga, and I’ve got endoscopies scheduled for tomorrow to sort out an unusual development in my duodenum.
And I’ve been on a decluttering mission. Clearing clutter helps me feel a bit more in control of my situation. It makes it simpler to find the things I need, when I need them. And of course it creates actual, literal space for abundance and/or better things to come into my life. I’m hoping for better health and more coaching clients at present, but I’ve found that clearing clutter allows all sorts of good stuff to enter your life.
Photo by Sarah Brown from Unsplash
I think part of it may be the good karma that you create by letting go of the things that no longer serve you, whether it’s a pair of pants that no longer fit, a brand-new sweater that you never wore but don’t really care for, a set of dishes or a piece of art or furniture that crowds your space or doesn’t make you happy . . . All those sorts of things might be someone else’s dream, and letting those items go to find their true owners is good for everyone involved.
Also? I think that keeping those things that make you unhappy is bad for everyone involved. Why do you want clothes in your closet or dresser that make you feel badly (for any reason)? How do you benefit from feeling badly about your clothing or your body?
Why do you want to start negative conversations with yourself? You know the sort—where you berate yourself for not being a certain size or shape, or compare yourself to ______ (a sister, friend, celebrity, impossible ideal). A study showed that 97% of women say or think something negative about their bodies each day. On average, women experience 13 negative thoughts about their bodies each day, with some women having 50 or even 100 or more negative thoughts about how they look and how they feel in their bodies.
That shit has to stop. And I say that as a person who became anorexic in high school and who spent close to ten years micromanaging my weight. I say it as an intelligent woman who spent decades calling herself an idiot, berating herself for being “stupid” or “disorganized” or “clumsy” or “ridiculous.” Some of those labels were inherited from other people, which is exceedingly unfortunate.
I’m here to tell you that you can at least quiet those negative thoughts and the negative voice that turns up in your head. It takes practice, and it takes radical self-acceptance, but it can be done. I know, because I’ve done it. And if I can do it, any woman can do it too.
The first step I took was to realize that I deserve to be happy in this life. I’m guessing you don’t disagree with me when I say that, because don’t we all think other people deserve to be happy? Of course we do. Which is why I believe that YOU deserve to be happy in this life. Start by looking yourself in the eye in a mirror and saying “I deserve to be happy in this life” every morning and evening.
Last year, I went one better and started making focused eye contact with myself in the mirror until I could see my inner self clearly (sort of like looking for your inner child inside), then saying “I love you” out loud.
The next step is to consider whether you might want to start decluttering the items and objects in your life that contribute to any unhappiness you feel. When you pair positive statements with positive actions, amazing things can happen.
If you like our weekly tips, please consider signing up for our weekly email newsletter as well—you get bonus content in those! And we’d appreciate you sending along any of your friends who you think would enjoy it, too!
