Feb 8

Feb 8 Be Your Own Valentine

Oh hey! Would you look at that? It’s almost Valentine’s Day.

I don't care if you love the idea of the day or not. Whether you believe it’s a “Hallmark holiday” or something real. Because what I’m interested in talking about is loving yourself, not waiting for someone else to to buy you a card or some flowers.

I don’t want you to scramble around shopping for the perfect gift to give someone else.

I don’t want you to spend thirty minutes reading rhymes in the card aisle, or finding the perfect card for that person you just started dating, but it’s really not a serious relationship yet.

I mean, you can do all of those things if you want to. Heck, I have already picked out Morris’s card, and ordered him a wee gift that I am pretty sure will delight him.

This week, I want to talk about being your own damn valentine.

I have already set up a landing page that is super pretty, so if you are impatient and just want in on the free five-day event, you can mash this link and be done.

When it comes to Valentine’s Day (or our birthdays, or any other occasion, really), many of us focus on other people. That’s because we are awesome, caring souls who like to bring happiness into the world by doing things for other people.

I would like to invite you to focus on bringing that sort of love and care and happiness to yourself.

Here’s a question to ponder: When it comes to Valentine’s Day, what would delight you?

Standard Valentine’s Day traditions include things like chocolates (or other candy), flowers, and other types of gifts. If you want chocolates, why not order them for yourself? Get the good ones. You know, the ones you’d rather not share. And then don’t share them.

If you love flowers, but you either have nobody to buy them for you or you can’t rely on your person to get you the kind you most want, why don’t you pick some up or order some for yourself? Hell—order them today, and you should still be enjoying them come next Monday.

You don’t have to buy the overpriced, scentless red roses that are gonna wilt before they bloom, either. It can be whatever you want—from simple to exotic. Buy yourself some pretty flowers. Something that charms and delights you.

Gifts? Sure! Why the hell not? Order or pick up something for yourself that feels like a small luxury, whether it’s a new bath bomb, silk long underwear (if you are always cold, these are a game changer), or some thick, warm socks or slippers.

Or if it’s more your jam, a wardrobe refresh might be in order, or a piece of jewelry—some earrings, a ring, a necklace, or even a tiara. You do you!

Or maybe you want to go full hygge and create a cozy corner in your home with a new afghan or weighted blanket, some candles, and one of those tabletop s’mores kits. Or get yourself some new loungewear or pjs. They don’t have to be pink or red or have hearts on them, unless that’s what delights you.

Thinking you want a gift for your inner child? Buy yourself a soft, fuzzy stuffed animal that you want to hug and squish. Or a dollhouse. Or a jigsaw puzzle that makes you smile.

None of these ideas has to break the bank. I am 100% going to buy myself some of the good chocolates for Valentine’s Day. I’ll be getting mine at Mecha Chocolates, which makes amazing hand-crafted caramels. But if what delights you is a good, old-fashioned Whitman Sampler or heart-shaped box from Russell Stover, I say go for it!

And then sign up for next week’s Be Your Own Valentine event, where you will get daily love letters from me. Each morning’s email will include an affirmation, as well as a technique or practice to help you gain in self-love and self-compassion.